Surviving day to day

I may only post once a week for awhile, or when something big happens. Life is just a little crazy right now and honestly I'm just really tired, I am finding it hard to find the time and modivation to sit down and do much of anything but survive right now. Especially with this heat, at least our air conditioning is working. I am so grateful for that. I just wish it was working in the car, the car rides are horrible with this heat, but it is just way too expensive to fix. We don't get heat like this often, so if we just wait a little bit the heat will end and we'll be ok. Our windshield wipers and heat work and those are more necessities here in Oregon then air conditioning.
Avarie had her bone marrow biopsy today. It went well. We should get some preliminary results later this week, but for the full break down on which marrow cells are in her it will be next week some time. She has started having a lot more tummy pain, especially at night. The Dr seems to think that it may be graft vs host starting. They think she may just be delayed, which is uncommon but not unheard of. Avarie always gets the uncommon thing. At least it has renewed my hope that the transplant worked. I have been mentally preparing myself for the fact that it may not have worked and it may be her marrow inside, but with this latest tummy issue I am starting to feel hopeful. I hate that it makes me happy that she is having discomfort. I'm just so ready for this all to be over and be able to move on with our life. I just hate to think that the transplant didn't work and that we would have to go through all this again. But I'm not going there, I am determined to remain hopeful. Its been hard this last couple of weeks. Its been a long couple of weeks for us. She is doing great, its just life seems hard right now and yet everything seems stuck dealing with cancer so I can't go and fix anything in life. I hate that feeling. I am a fixer and well as many of you who know me I'm kind of a, just a little bit of a controller. I hate having so much going on in my life and be unable to control any of it or do anything to fix it.
I will update when I have some info, but please know that Avarie is doing great, it is amazing to see her doing so well after such a hard path that she took early on. I'm just ready to be able to say all my kids are healthy and be able to start making plans for the future and stop just living day to day.
Sorry if this post was kind of down sounding, its just kind of where I'm at right now. I'll shake out of it soon.
Hope you enjoy the pictures. They were from Sawyer's Birthday. He turned 2 on Monday the 27th. Avarie helped make his cupcakes and his blue frosting. She ate so much blue frosting that her diapers where odd colored the next day.